After an opening flub, Bob “New Draft” Hope jokes about the requirement to register for the draft. Jokes include topics about the weather, and Springtime rains, dating, rubber shortages, Spring fever, being healthy, and being cheerful. All manner of gardening jokes, and those on victory gardens abound.
Francis Langford is joined by the Six Hits and a Miss to sing, I Remember April and You. Before getting back to the script, Bob recognizes a fellow vaudevillian from their early years. Laird Cregar joins Boot joke about appearances, woman drivers, fashion, and being heavy. Laird tells how he got into show biz, and the film he’s in now. Has playing detectives made Laird a good one in real life? Starlets, leading ladies, and co-stars are topics, as are dressing rooms, and love scenes. Bob tells about his own beginnings in Hollywood. How has Laird been dealing with success? Skinny Ennis comes out to meet the hefty Lars. Let the fat jokes, and skinny jokes begin. Not to mention scrawny verses large, the battle of good physiques, being healthy, and the like. Skinny Ennis is joined by the Six Hits and a Miss to sing, Somebody Else.
Bob and Skinny discuss a stolen spare tire, jokes include bicycles, changing tires, and ads in the paper may have a lead to the stolen tire. Colonna is an all-round police officer who takes their call. The investigation is on and includes jokes on being scared, swamps, bravery, Ghosts, and all manner of spookiness. Laird is the creepy owner of a mansion of spooky madness. Colonna arrives to add to the zaniness. Even if he arrests Laird, how will they get the large man to jail? Is the house haunted? Will Bob get his tire?
Note: Alvea Almon plays several voices in the show.